So, a week or so after the judge signed my divorce paperwork, I joined one of those popular dating sites. It's entertaining to say the least of it. I have had a few conversations, some really good, some not so good.
First you give yourself a nickname/avatar. The "about me" questions that you are asked to complete are so generalized but yet they hold some major importance to them... like Do you have any kids? Next, you are asked to write about yourself in 200 words or less; and I bet that is where everyone, like me, stares blankly at the screen for several minutes. How do you "cliff note" yourself and still get the message across of who you really are? Last, you're asked questions about who you are looking for. Here we go back to the same generalized questions as I answered 'about me'. Now, based off of these generalized questions, the program matches you up with people in your area. Everyday, or every other day, you receive an email with a list of people in your area that match up to your answers. This is where the fun begins.
Nicknames should definitely be personal to who you are; be it a name you gave yourself, or a name your family & friends gave you. I do believe, though, that someone else in the world should be able to read it. I also think that you should give it a small amount of thought & creativity. Just putting your name up there works, it really does, but showing a little fun adds some character. Some nicknames though, should be reconsidered.
When you finally decide what to write about yourself in 200 words or less.... check your grammar and your spelling... for the love of mankind... please check your grammar and your spelling. When you are answering the questions about who you are looking for, consider that these questions, while important, are generalized into categories.
Add a photo! Please! I know looks aren't the most important thing about a person, but a picture is worth a thousand words. For instance, the expression on your face; the location of the photo; the clothes you are wearing (or not wearing *eye roll*); the pose; the objects in the background... all those things can reveal more about you. If you don't have enough confidence to add a picture of yourself... well, you probably shouldn't be on a dating site.
Be bold! Send an email, and say Hello. Try to have a conversation, if it's comes naturally that is awesome. If you struggle, then let the conversation fizzle out and disappear. But just reading some one's profile over and over is not going to teach you more about them. Be brave.
The last thing I can say is, be open-minded. I'm not saying you should change your standards, but rather just to remember that the "generalized" questions don't really dig into the depth of a person. Until you are friendly enough to say hello, you won't know if they are "the one" or just a passing conversation.
All that being said, I have given serious thought to starting my own site and coordinating "get together"s in my area of my own.
Well.... happy hunting to you... "and may the odds be ever in your favor". Hee Hee.
No comments:
Post a Comment